Thanks to Rus Cooper-Dowda for this elegantly restrained report about employment testing in the universe set up for people with disabilities. I hope someday to be able to write about such experiences with as much clarity and patience.--MS

Tales From The Crip
Alice in Standardized Testing Land

Rus Cooper-Dowda
uudre@aol.com

As part of my current urgent job hunt, I agreed to undergo standardized testing for my local vocational rehabilitiation office. Here is the tale of that strange cruise.

Part of the arrangement was that the testing service would use their vans to pick all us disabled people up to be tested on each of the two days involved. We were each given a 90-minute waiting period--and the pick-up was still late for everyone. We were then given demerit points for being late both days. even though it was their own fault.

In addition, the vocational rehab counselor who made my ride reservation did not mention that I was a wheelchair user. When I called that counselor the first morning to say we had to reschedule for safer transportation, she replied that if not being able to use my wheelchair was going to stop me. then I must not really want job help.

So for the two days all the way back and forth on the van I got to listen to my wheelchair slide around unsecured, until it finally broke on the second day--all to prove I was serious about my job search.

We could not find out until we arrived at the center how long the testing would be or when we would get home. Parents with disabilities then asked to use the phones to let their kids at home know when they'd be returning. We were denied use of the phones, because we should have told our kids before we left home-- even though we did not know then ourselves.

Indeed, the paperwork included a sheet that had pre-printed problems to "solve" before we could be considered truly "ready" to work. Being a parent was one. Being the head of a household was another. Being gay or lesbian were two more. I am not making this up.

The vision statement for this testing group included lines about responding to emerging disabled community needs and the individual crip's right to participate in the determination of a job goal. This was read right before a tester announced that, since we all had disabilities, we were slated to be special education teachers. None of us had any interest in teaching. None of us had credentials. It didn't matter. Our "career interest" was locked in before the first career interest test began.

Yet, it could have been worse. I had already peeked into the "Customer Service Training Center." It was filled with disabled people doing telemarketing.

We were forced to sign a statement saying that we had read both the Creed of the testing group and the Client Handbook. The only copies of these that we ever saw were thumbtacked to the wall--too high for most of us to reach. I managed to steal the Client Handbook overnight and read it for everybody. Right #7 said we had the right to receive copies of everything we signed. We didn't get any copies of ANYTHING we signed during the entire two days of testing.

We couldn't even get copies of the information on how to appeal decisions based on test results right after the testers told us we had the right to do exactly that.

The testers spent our first hour telling us how to dress professionally for work. All the people who'd come for the testing were already dressed in the manner they recommended. The only people not dressed professionally were the testers themselves. Indeed, after 20 minutes discussing why it was wrong to wear flip-flops to work, I looked down at the feet of the staff. You quessed it! They were the only ones in the room wearing flip-flops.

There were no alternative formats, readers or personal assistants provided, even though the disabilities represented by the audience necessitated them. In fact, the blind woman who came in for testing was sent home in a cab before the first hour was up. Why? They had not provided alternative formats even after being requested, and the professional Sign Language Interpreter on staff rightly refused to stop signing in another meeting to be a reader during our testing instead.

Several people in the room had learning disabilities but the rule was that all directions were to be read silently. Those same LD folks could not get extra time for tests. One person who had seizures set off by very fast, simple mathematical problems could not get exempted from the very fast, simple math problem test.She did have a seizure because of that test-- just as she had told them she would.The testers called an ambulance. She never came back.

The very last test was to draw as many tiny straight lines as fast as we could for several minutes. Before it began, the tester announced that it was a "piece of cake" and that everyone could do this easily. By the end of the test, people with hand mobility problems and carpel tunnel syndrome were audibly crying from pain.

Adding to the trauma of the testing was that the roof above the client lounge was sustaining heavy water damage from lots of rain during our time in the room. It was filled with an increasing number of huge industrial garbage cans to catch the leaks. Pieces of the false ceiling fell around us while we watched. That was where we had to wait between testing sessions-- and also where we had to eat lunch.

I had three favorite fill-in-the-blanks. The first said, "If you have been declared legally incompetent to sign documents, put your name and date in writing at the bottom of this page." The second asked us room full of women with disabilities, "Would you rather be the Pope or Colonel Sanders?" The third asked,"Would you rather take your violent anger out on groups of peopleyou do not know or turn it in on yourself?"

Every single test we were given could have been done at home. Even the test-givers admitted that.

Here's the final kicker: I just found out that only two days from now, I will have my appointment to go over the career testing results. The appointment was actually made two weeks ago. But no one told me about it until I called to find out why I hadn't had a date set up yet. Plus, the same wheelchair-inaccessible transportation has been set up again for me, again without my participation.

My hopes are not high about this alleged "career testing" for people with disabilities. Can you blame me?